This is not Goodbye, it's Hello...

Hello to all my lovely Holmes Gang friends,

As much as I have loved and at time hated (sorry I can't say love when thinking about my baby cakes passing) blogging about our little Holmes Gang, the time has come to spread my wings and be a bigger inspiration to my little 'take on anything girl' Imogen. This second year without Imogen has been extremely hard and a huge struggle. I have had a hard time dealing with the reality and enormity of the fact my angel girl is not ever returning. Recently I engaged in a few sessions with a life coach and have been given a breathe of fresh of air, this was what I needed. It has taught me about the person who I want to be now and into the future. This has lead to me expanding the 'Imogen's Angels' dream and begin to blog about my passion which is allowing kids to be creative and embrace art and craft in any fashion.

I hope that you will join me there and continue to help me become the person Imogen would have loved me to be. www.imogensangels.com.au

Much love and a million thank yous for your support and love over the years x

Fiona and the Holmes Gang forever.

My Imogen,

I love you and miss you a little (actually a lot more) more everyday. Your story will live on and continue to inspire so many. Your blog; our blog will remain and be here at the Holmes Gang forever more. You are my hero, my sunshine, my reason. I promise I will drop back past at times and water the flowers and help keep you alive in our hearts always. I know you will be right beside me as our new adventure begins.

Big Kisses xxxx

Love you to the moon and back, baby girl

x Fiona

'Princess Ladybird'

Wow it’s been a long time since I posted, I will be honest when I blogged last time I got to thinking whether the blog was helping me with my grief or if it wasn’t.

You see it started to feel to me that I was going in circles, with the same tune playing over and over again…All I want is Imogen back, and coming to the blog just enhanced the fact again that she ain’t ever coming back.

There are days I am comforted with the fact Imogen can never be in pain again, she is safely tucked away in the clouds with the other sweet angels; other days I am sad and angry that she is not here.

I think I have slowly come to the realisation, as many people who have lost a child have told me, that these emotions and feelings are never going any where.

Instead in ten…twenty..years I will still feel as passionate for the need to have Imogen here with me…though instead of living in saddest and anger I will slowly learning to live with ‘spirit’ Imogen and the ugly grief by my side.

I have definitely not perfected this and the second year apart from her has definitely been harder than the first, the numbness has gone and the raw pain has been allowed to slip in.

All I can promise right now is that I will continue to take another step forward in life each day, with the vow that I live my life to the fullest for Miss Imogen and everyday try to make her proud of me as her mum.

On that note…I had a brainwave…I didn’t want anyone to forget our Imogen and actually I wanted more people who never knew her to know all about our amazing courageous girl.

This lead to the week before her birthday week (which was last week) I decided to launch ‘Imogen’s Angels Dream’.

I decided to make a ‘Princess Ladybird’ brooch in green (Imogen’s favourite colour), my goal was to sell 100.

This little brooch is to be sold from just before Imogen’s 8^th birthday on the 26^th of April 2012 to the 1^st of May 2012, her second angel anniversary to remember her and also most importantly raise funds with all proceeds going to the amazing ‘Make a Wish’.

Many of you would know we were fortunate enough to recieve a Make a Wish for Imogen in September 2009. Fast forward a few years and now ‘Make a Wish’ has had to stop taking any more wish applications as their donations have had a major downturn and they already have up to 300 ungranted wishes already on their books!

The memories we have from Imogen’s Make a Wish are priceless to us and we want to give a little (or a lot) of the love back to Make a Wish.

If you think you can help me and Imogen’s dream by purchasing one or many ‘ Princess Ladybirds’ please drop over to my facebook site by clicking on the link below. Did you know even if your not a facebook member you can still have a look!. If that does work you can send me an email to imogen’sangels@hotmail.com.

Imogen's Angels Dream 

Up to last night we had already sold 85, so my goal looks like it will be blown away already for this year! Though I am happy to continue to make as many ‘Princess Ladybird’ as need to raise money for Make a Wish after all…

 

Love to you all

Fiona

Forever Imogen’s Mum

Signs and Moments

Hi all

Above is one of my favourite and most heartbreaking photos of me and my girl.

You see the this photo was taken on the day we found out Imogen had relapsed. I know scarey isn’t it how wonderful she looks, yet that beast was busy being absolutely horrible inside her. Yet on the other hand I am blessed to have this mummy and daughter snuggle captured in time, as I did not realise these would become non existent into the future.

I am blessed to receive a lot of cheeky and small signs from my girl. I believe you have to be open to this to really see these moments for what they are. I recent was feeling a little flat, as we had missed out going to see the fireworks for Australia Day which Imogen loved. As mother nature decided here in Perth that at the exact time of the fireworks she would put on her own show of rain, thunder and lightening. Not particular child friendly or anyone friendly, I am pretty sure no one wants to be hit by lightening!.

Anyway we came home early and I was channel surfing. I eventually decided on an Adam Hill (the Australian comedian) show. This is not something I would usually choose though I decided I needed a laugh. By the end of the show I could see why I and someone else decided I needed to watch this show.

Between all the laughs this is what Adam Hill said –

There are two types of people in this world ~ inflaters and deflaters. If you can inflate more people in your life then deflate then you have had a good life. If you continue to inflate people after you have gone from this world you have had a GREAT life.

This for me was what I needed to hear at this time, as this is what our girl Imogen continues to do each day, inflate as to the MAXIMUM. The memories we shared with her and the memories she left with us and many other people continue to make us who we are and will continue to inflate us for ever more.

Miss you my girl, Imogen, I see all your cheeky signs, you will always be my inflater ♥

Love to all

Fiona

And The Holmes Gang %%